


Every Goodbye, all at Once

by Venhedish



Series: Originally Posted on Tumblr [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Epistolary, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Pining Dean Winchester, Pre-Season/Series 01, Stanford Era (Supernatural), Voicemail
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:08:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28598982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Venhedish/pseuds/Venhedish
Summary: "Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester
Series: Originally Posted on Tumblr [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2107026
Comments: 20
Kudos: 149





	Every Goodbye, all at Once

**Author's Note:**

> For [wincest-now-and-forever](https://wincest-now-and-forever.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr. For their prompt, "can I have some Stanford-Era Angst with a side of Pining Dean and his abandonment issues please." 
> 
> This took an interesting direction in its execution, but I'm a sucker for the epistolary, so I hope it works!
> 
> Title borrowed from the poem "Three Questions," by Lang Leav.
> 
> Beta'd by the ineffable [Kalutyka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalutyka).

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**…**

**...**

**[** **_A quiet, shaking exhale._ ** **]**

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**…**

"So, uh. Today's the first day of the fall semester, according to Stanford's website. Buncha yuppie jackasses in the pictures on the calendar. You always could pick 'em, huh?

**…**

"Ah, _christ_ \--”

**[** **_Muffled cursing._ ** **]**

"I can't believe you left this fuckin' phone, man. Stupid. Guess you got our numbers memorized in case you need--

**...**

"I'm keeping it charged for now. Someone might call for Dad.

**…**

**[A harsh, guttural scoff.]**

"Jesus, what am I--"

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**[** _**Tinny, clinking noise of silverware. Unintelligible background chatter.** _ ****]** **

"Good luck on your finals, dickweed."

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

“Okay. You know _what_? Fuck you, Sam! I told you to stop me and you didn’t, goddamnit! I don’t get to run from this, so why should you?

**...**

“Just-- Just fucking come back, you selfish jerk.”

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**[** **_A whisper, breathy and slurred._ ** **]**

"Yeah. Called to hear you. It's late.

**...**

"I'm drunk, couldn't sleep. Bet you're at the library or something."

**[** **_A hiccup._ ** **]**

"Gettin' a pedicure or writing poetry like a girl. It's _Saturday_ , dude. You should be partyin'. Not-- not-- being all smart and probably sober."

**[** **_Rustling of fabric. The creak of bedsprings._ ** **]**

**…**

**[** **_Faint, labored breathing._ ** **]**

**…**

**…**

"I miss you, Sammy."

**…**

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

“Happy birthday, little brother.”

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

"Hey, uh. I dunno."

**[** **_A feeble laugh._ ** **]**

"Guess I'm outta' commission for a while. Naga venom stings like a sonuvabitch, kid, lemme' tell ya. Lucky you're probably in the Poconos or the Hamptons or wherever your douchebag friends go to spend the summer with Daddy’s money.

**…**

**...**

"You're such an asshole, Sam. I swear--"

**[** **_Deep, careworn sigh._ ** **]**

"I know I crossed a line, okay? I know I did that. But, _fuck_. You didn't have to leave forever. And I'm fucking sorry, okay, Sammy? Jesus, I-- I mean! I mean you kissed me _back_! I said, ‘ _tell me to stop_ ,’ but you just kissed me back!"

**[** **_A sudden hitched breath._ ** **]**

"Why'd you have to leave me with this? I'm hopeless at this shit and you know it. You're supposed to-- You're supposed to be the one who--"

**…**

**[** **_Crying._ ** **]**

**…**

**…**

**…**

"You weren't ever supposed to leave me."

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

"Hey, kid. Today's a year since you left. I realized I can't remember exactly what you look like anymore. How's that for some sappy shit? Good thing you're kinda ugly, huh?"

**…**

"Anyways. Still got your voice, at least."

**…**

"Wonder if you--"

**[** _**A** _ **_deep, muffled voice, stern and questioning._ ** **]**

"Yes, ma'am. A copy of the deed. Uh-huh. Okay. Well, thank you for your time. Bye."

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

“So, we had to ditch the card we were using to pay the bill on this thing. Dad says there’s no point keeping it paid up. Guess he’s right. 

**...**

_“Ah--_. Listen …”

**[** **_A cough._ ** **]**

“I really am sorry. I’m really, really, sorry, man. I love ya, Sammy.”

**[** **_Sniff. An even, steady sigh._ ** **]**

**…**

“I don’t want to forget your voice, too, you know? So just ... please come home, _okay_?

**…**

**…**

“Anyway. Bye.”

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**…**

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**…**

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"Hey, It's Sam. If you're looking for my dad, you can reach him at 866-555-9352. If you're looking for me, leave a message."_

**[Beep.]**

**...**

**[Click.]**

* * *

**[A brief, tuneless ring.]**

**[A soft click.]**

_"We're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. If you feel you have reached this recording in error, please check the number and try your call again."_

**[Click.]**

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
